Greetings to all our valued clients and readers,
I am excited to share a personal milestone with you all. This past weekend, I celebrated a significant achievement in my life: graduating from Southeastern Oklahoma State University with a Bachelor of Science degree in Computer Science, with Magna Cum Laude (with honors).
It took a long time to get here, but I finally made it. It’s a testament to the power of perseverance and resilience, as well how important it is to have support from family and friends.
The Journey
When I started, my daughter was just a baby and I was unhappily married. I did my best to take classes while looking after my daughter, working part-time, and enduring my bad marriage which ultimately led into a contentious divorce. By that point, unfortunately, I had to drop out after completing around 3 years worth of classes. I had wanted to return but as time passed, that goal seemed completely out of reach.
I faced personal and financial hurdles, including a period of homelessness. In around 2015, I was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome (a form of high-functioning autism) and severe anxiety. While the diagnosis initially made me feel completely incapable and disabled, over time I’ve managed to prove I can overcome.
I had setback after setback, but despite all the challenges and difficulties, they were stepping stones to something greater – I just couldn’t see it at the time.
My diagnosis and hardships led me on a journey of self discovery, spiritual awakening, and personal development.
Every challenge I’ve had to overcome, every person that I’ve met along the way, played some role in the story of what brought me to where I am today.
Despite the many years that passed, I was encouraged to finish my degree. It seemed too difficult to due to the cost, the work involved, and trying to return after so long. I was also embarrassed and ashamed of the personal mistakes and foolish decisions I made years before.
With the encouragement of my professor, family, and friends, I returned to Southeastern and started taking classes online to work towards finishing my degree. This time, my daughter was no longer a toddler but a teen, I was (and still am) happily married to my best friend (we got married in July of 2020), and I had become a business owner doing something I love.
After all the hardship, emotional pain, misery, and difficulties that I’ve had in my life, to get to this point is nothing short of a miracle. This was like climbing to the top of a mountain, and now I’m looking back at the long and difficult path I traveled.
My Passion for Technology
For my whole life, I’ve been fascinated with technology and computers. That fascination was likely inspired by my father, who exposed me to computers from a very young age.
My father worked for Boeing as some kind of programmer. He made a place for me to sit in his home office where I played with a computer while he worked on his. Though not much was said between us, and I feel like I didn’t really know him or much about him, it is one of the few positive memories I have of him.
He died when I was 12. It was his choice, not mine, but that choice changed my life and my family’s forever. In the years that followed, despite the dark and haunting memories of my father, I decided to study computers in school, a path that would in some way follow his footsteps, but, thankfully, result in a much different outcome.
In high school, I was given the opportunity to take computer classes, so I took every class I could. Mr. Currell, my high school IT (Information Technology) teacher, taught me so many things in his classes, from the basics of web development and coding, to 3D animation. I sat as close to the front as possible in every one of his classes.
I was blessed to be able to take those classes. I was one of the small percentage of girls to do so, as IT was, and still is, a male dominated field.
You’ll Never Know Unless You Try
Can you believe I used to think I couldn’t code? I honestly didn’t feel smart enough to do it. I seriously doubted my capability.
Most people who think they can’t do something will think to themselves, “I can’t do it, so why bother trying?” so they give up or don’t put in the effort to really learn or stick with it long enough.
Fortunately, I’m not like that. I’m stubborn and I lean towards being more optimistic (often overly so) with the perspective of: I won’t know unless I try and do my best.
It takes a positive frame of mind and hope to have the motivation to keep trying when you fail and make mistakes.. especially repeatedly. It’s also this same frame of mind that is required for starting and running a business, and being able to overcome the hard times we all have in life.
Has this field been challenging? Very. But I know if I do my best, then I can walk away without regret knowing that I tried.
My Choice to Pursue a Higher Education
When I decided to go to university back in 2007 to pursue a degree, I honestly wanted a degree in everything due to my varied and widespread interests, but computer science stuck out as my number one choice, and my second choice was graphic design.
I loved my computer science classes at Southeastern with Dr. Su, Dr. Qian, and Mr. Morris. Even though my classes are over now, I will always keep learning because by doing so, I will be able to do more than I can right now.
Being able to write code and see it actually work is an amazing motivator. It lead me to try to figure out what else I can make it do and wanting to improve upon it.
The more I learned, the more ways I found I could use my new skills to do things, including to help others.
I love learning practical skills that I can use to solve problems and help people, and technology is one of those things I’ve learned a lot about that I’ve found to be incredibly useful.
Gratitude and Reflection
As I reflect on this journey, my heart is full of gratitude and joy.
To my friends, family, and mentors who stood by me, encouraged me, and supported me through this time, you helped give me strength to get here.
I owe many thanks to Dr. Su, who encouraged me to return to Southeastern and finish the degree program online.
I owe many thanks to all those who prayed for me over the years and helped me through the many challenges in my life.
I owe many thanks to Families Feeding Families and all those who helped me at the awful point in my life when I was homeless, your kindness and generosity will never be forgotten.
To my clients, your trust, encouragement, and business were vital to my success, helping me reach this great achievement.
To my husband and daughter, thank you for standing by my side and giving your full support through this. I wouldn’t have made it without you!
There is one, who I owe, the greatest amount of thanks to, and that is God. Regardless of whether or not you believe in a higher power, God is the one that helped me through the most painful and difficult times of my life, and to overcome many obstacles. Without God, I wouldn’t even be here.
Looking Ahead
This degree is not just a personal triumph, it is a commitment to all of you. It signifies my dedication to offering the best of my skills and knowledge in our collaborations, as well as everything I do.
I hope to use all my knowledge and skills to make the biggest positive impact I can have on the world, and I hope you will too.
Final Thoughts
Thank you all, for being a part of this journey.
I hope that my story can serve as inspiration to those facing their own challenges and feeling full of despair.
The darkest times are when it is most difficult have hope and see the positive, yet that is when we need it the most.
No matter the challenges and obstacles you face, have faith and don’t give up. You’ll never really know what could happen, unless you try and do your best.
If you believe in God, fight your battles on your knees and give your troubles to God. He can light the way and guide you to the path you should go.
All the Best,
Melissa (Lisa) Li
